009 | One Day

Below are the lyrics to my favorite Matisyahu song. It's the greatest picture of hope for a new creation that I've ever come across.

Just thought I'd share. :)

Watch the music video.

Sometimes I lay under the moon, and thank God I'm breathing. Then I pray, "Don't take me soon", 'cause I am here for a reason.

Sometimes in my tears I drown, but I never let it get me down. So when negativity surrounds, I know someday it'll all turn around, because...

All my life I've been waiting for, I've been praying for, for the people to say that we don't want to fight no more. There'll be no more wars, and our children will play.

One day, one day, one day...

It's not about win or lose, 'cause we all lose when we feed on the souls of the innocent --- blood-drenched pavement. Keep on moving, though the waters stay raging.

And in this maze you can lose your way, your way. It might drive you crazy, but don't let it phase you, no way, no way.

One day this all will change --- treat people the same, stop with the violence, down with the hate.

One day we'll all be free and proud to be under the same sun, singing songs of freedom.

One day, one day, one day...

008 | GLaDOS O Glad

April 19th, 2011 will forever be a turning point in my life. Not because it's the supposed launch date of a certain fictional computer intelligence system that eventually goes rogue and attempts to destroy mankind, but because it marks the day that Portal ceased to be my favorite video game of all time.

You might be asking yourself "What could ever lead a person to decry such a prime example of innovation?" Why, none other than its sequel, of course! Having shown up at midnight to claim my purchase, I swiftly made my way back home in order to embark upon the journey that would transcend every preconceived notion I had about the game.

And after three days of joyful engagement, the verdict is finally in: I've never played anything so incredible before. Round of applause for Valve and every single individual who had a hand in bringing Portal 2 to fruition.

Now you're probably wondering "Okay, so what makes this game so amazing?" I'll begin with the fact that it's actually TWO games. The single player is rather short for an in-box product (although it's definitely longer than the first). However, the co-op makes up for this entirely by providing us with a completely independent storyline. All-in-all, I've probably registered about thirty six hours so far --- and that's just my first playthrough. If one was so inclined as to strive to earn all the achievements, I'm thinking upwards of fifty hours would be the end result. Basically, what seems at first like a very short game can be extended according to the player's will.

In addition, the developers made sure to re-incorporate everything that people loved about the original. For instance, the quirky humor that turned Portal 1 into the cult classic it's known as today is present from start to finish. It also seems as though Valve tried to keep things fresh by knowing where to draw the line in regard to old jokes that have been tired out --- i.e. references to cake are extremely scarce.

Finally (and perhaps most importantly), the smooth gameplay and ingenious level design fuse to create an experience that's unlike any other. Few titles will leave a gamer with such a feeling of exhilaration AND satisfaction in the same breath. Words really aren't helpful in describing this. My advice? Go buy yourself a copy and play it. I promise you won't be sorry. The question I keep hearing over and over: "Is it worth sixty dollars?" The answer: "Every. Damn. Penny."

To view the teaser trailer for Portal 2, click here.

007 | Hello / Goodbye

After five years of trying (and I use that term loosely), I've finally done it --- and by "it", I mean held a steady job. Since June of 2010 and until last week, my income has been wholly dependent on one Howard Schultz. That's right --- I was a drone to the corporate coffee hive. But as I much as I loved it (a term I use even more loosely), I'm afraid I've had to "pass the Buck" (terrible pun, I know) to somebody else in favor of a position with more favorable returns.

Two days ago, I was certified as a server at Macaroni Grill. This process consisted of my waiting three tables over the course of an hour in order to demonstrate to my supervisors that I was ready to be independent. When it was over, I left with forty dollars in my pocket. That's approximately what I used to make per week at Starbucks. Of course, we're only talking gratuity. In base pay, I was actually making more previously than I am now. But when it comes to tips like that, a bi-monthly check is just going to seem like a bonus.

It's unusual for me to be so concerned with money, but as of late I haven't really had a choice. Things just seem to be piling up financially. But I know better than to make it the be-all and end-all of my existence. In times of anxiety, I do my best to remember Jesus' words in Matthew 6: "Do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life? But seek first God's kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." (Verses 25, 27, 33-34)

To be honest, I'm grateful that money is my biggest concern right now. It beats dealing with all the health issues that have surfaced over the past year. Sometimes I think we get so wrapped up in trivial matters that we forget to slow down, take a step back, and reflect on what an incredible gift life itself is. I, for one, can easily say that that fact will never be lost on me again.

006 | Pressing On

If God came to me right now and said I could have anything in the world, all I'd ask for is the ability to relax. And by that I don't mean a few days off of work (he knows I need the hours). What I'm referring to is peace of mind --- something I haven't experienced in what seems like a very long time.

I wish the cause of my anxiety was nothing but an ordinary issue that I could blow out of proportion in an attempt to make life feel meaningful and important. Unfortunately, it's not. I'm going to be twenty-three years old this coming Friday. Sounds terrible, right? Perhaps I'd be more excited if my doctors would stop telling me I probably have multiple sclerosis. It's kind of a downer.

And I might not be so upset about it if I wasn't a hypochondriac to begin with. In 2009, my mom was diagnosed with lung cancer. She made it through, but ever since then I've been extremely fearful of developing a serious illness myself. And it sure doesn't help to know that I could actually have one.

Even if I did, though, I can't imagine any symptom being more debilitating than the emotional stress that a psychological disorder such as mine can cause. I just want it to stop.

But the only thing to do, I suppose, is continue living my life. What other option is there? We all have our burdens, and this is mine. Who knows --- perhaps I can turn it into an opportunity for good by helping others facing the same problem.

I know this has been a rather morbid entry and for that I'm sorry. I'll try to ensure that my future posts are slightly more uplifting. This is just something I really needed to get off my chest. Thanks for reading.